WELCOME!
Today is the beginning of a new year. I always love beginnings, the precipice of promise. When things are still shiny and hopeful without the heaviness and tarnish of disappointment. This year I find myself on the verge of a transition.
30.
I will bid adieu to my 20's and shift into another decade.
I find myself feeling a bit adrift.
I find myself feeling a bit adrift.
Unmoored in this sea of aging.
Not quite an adult, not quite a child. I still rent, I have no children (except my adorable yorkie Beast), and I am just not so sure what it all means. Save a few insights after some soul searching ruminations, I have more questions than answers. But I do know this, I am fearfully and wonderfully made and my main purpose in life is to connect with my maker and show love to those around me.
One of my favorite concepts my dad has taught me is his illustration of seeing through a shower door. You know the kind that distort the human body to resemble a Picasso painting. He employs this depiction of vision to explain 1 Corinthians 13:12 "For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known."
I am aware that there are things that I just can't know or understand here on earth. But this year on this 12 month journey to 30, I have decided to focus on one thing each month with the intention of knowing the Lord more fully and knowing my self more fully. Each month will have a theme and a set of ground rules. I invite any of you to join in with me for support, insight and mutual growth. In an uncharachteristic display of vulnerability I will chronicle this journey for you dear reader. So I invite you to pursue your maker, to woo your very own soul. Create an intentional space where you can grow and I believe the bounty will be uncontainable.
January: Clean
February: Quiet
March: Joy
April: Least
May: Light
June: Intentional
July: Adventure
August: Create
September: Celebrate
October: Journey
November: Seek
December: Unknown
What a great idea, Bekah! I felt many of the same feelings when I turned 30...must be something about the milestone. You're so brave to share this journey. Can't wait to see where it takes you!
ReplyDeleteSorry Bekah for not posting sooner—your Mom sent me the link but I’m just figuring out this “ inter-web”—LOL.
ReplyDeleteAs someone who has walked through 30 over 20 years ago, I thought I could lend some perspective and encouragement.
We were created to struggle and fight to discover who God is. Like Jacob, we are supposed to wrestle with God through our fears, doubts, and insecurities to better understand the very nature of God. What we develop in return is a character that reflects Gods nature. We begin to learn that we really are “wonderfully and fearfully made” and that God has given is the tools to accomplish His will for our lives (if we do the work).
I’m intrigued with the student-teacher relationship from my martial arts training. As I worked hard towards my Black Belt, I began to understand I had the skills needed to accomplish this purpose. It didn’t come without sweat, sacrifice, bruises, and even a little blood and pain. But it did come. Then once I was awarded my Black Belt, I came to understand it was just a “dirt white belt” as my master told me all along. Only made black through the struggle. The hard-fought struggle, the journey, is to be honored. Through it is where character is born.
We all get older but remember Bekah, gaining wisdom and understanding is optional. Unfortunately, the former does NOT automatically follow the latter.
I’m proud of you for being brave enough to expose your struggles as God continues to develop your character. YOU are WONDERFULLY and FEARFULLY made. I know because your Mom and I were at the beginning of your earthly journey. It was WONDERFULLY! The opposite of courage is NOT fear; they follow the same path, they are companions. The opposite of courage is quitting. As you walk through these 12 months, you will become even more anchored. We will all be privileged enough to see just how wonderful God is through His creation, Rebekah.
Your Mom and I are very proud of your courage. Continue to run the race, fight the good fight, and you too will hear God say, “well done my good and faithful servant” (whom I have wonderfully and fearfully made)!